You say crabs like it's a bad thing

The young un has taken a recent liking to a certain seafood restaurant. Give him a choice and he's yelling out Joe's before the questions has even left your mouth. Why the attraction to peace love and crabs? Could it be the seafood fondue appetizer? Or maybe the crab claw bucket? Nope, it's the chicken strips and fries he orders every time. And the fact that they sponsor a kids' game at the local minor league ballpark.

I give you the "Crab Grab"

Dress up in claws, feet and head gear.

Wait patiently for the 3rd inning to be over so you can take the field.

Plan your strategy with the college helper.

Grab balls as fast as you can and try not to trip.

Bask in the glory of the entire 3rd base side cheering your name.

Six Word Saturday

Who can get whooping cough? Me!

Um, yeah, that whooping cough. The one everyone used to get vaccinated for until it was linked to higher risk of autism. The one that leaves me gasping for breath and on the verge of throwing up. The one that's highly contagious. The one now making the rounds in my school district (40 reported cases this year). I'm requesting hazard pay.

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Even Friday has lost it's thrill....

But since yesterday's post was full of tension, I'll try to tone it down a little today. Friday is the day I have morning duty. Which makes it a little harder to motivate myself to get out of bed, knowing I'll be thrown straight into the day. I like my quiet time in my classroom before the chaos of the day begins; lockers slamming, shoes squeaking, books being dropped, and the general drama filled conversations of the tween set. But, if I want quiet on Friday morning, I have to get up even earlier than normal, a price I'm just not willing to pay. Instead, I sacrifice my quiet in exchange for a round rock donut. covered in chocolate. And as I stand in the front hall checking for passes, I savor the sweet, sweet sugar rush that gets me through the morning.

Other things that got me through the week (in no particular order):
Apple turnover yoplait yogurt.
Turkey bacon.
Theraflu warming relief cough syrup
Crossfit workouts ("running jackie" was almost as RX!)
Vanilla Diet Cherry Limeades from Sonic Happy Hour.
Tuesday night at the Dell.
One Tree Hill & Lie to Me
Guitar Hero Metallica - which I might have played for over an hour by myself on beginner level
Archiver's coupons to finish teacher appreciation gifts.

The good news is I only have 4 more days to be under this tremendous stress. My kiddoes test next Friday and it's all over after that. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

A Violent Streak

You know those days when you just want to hit something? When you finally realize that banging your head against the wall is getting you nowhere, and maybe the only way to get your point made is just to punch someone. hard. in the face. Today was that day.
Teaching is never more stressful than during the No Child Left Behind period of state testing. If you have school age kids, you know I speak the truth. Things that I would normally just "breathe and let go" through have got me ready to vote people off the island. It doesn't help that every 5 minutes I find myself in the midst of a coughing fit. Needless to say I have no tolerance for anything.
Things I want to punch in the face:
The guy who stops completely before turning into the entrance lane of the tollway.
My stupid computer that wants to restart every 4 minutes.
The cough syrup that promises 8 hours of relief but falters after one.
The state education board for buying into incentive pay.
People unwilling to let me just teach my classes without the added bs.
The four easter crafts still in various stages of incompleteness on my craft desk.
My alarm clock.
Monday night games that start at 8:00 p.m.
The current pollen du jour circulating in the air.
The creator of the Burger King "Square Butts" commercial.

In my effort to not actually hit anything at the workplace, I found this blog. I totally agree with her stance on typing e-mails in all caps, and the horror movie trailer is so true for me right now while the Mr is in NYC. I'm sure he's glad he's not here to be subjected to "sleep hitting".

So if the furniture is a little roughed up around here, it's all in the name of keeping my sanity for the next 8 days.

Oh, and thanks Cate for offering to do any punching needed!

I'm still here.

I know I'm kidding myself every January when I think things will slow down after the holidays. I'm still waiting for that slowdown to occur. Baseball has been going full speed ahead for the young un, and when our hometown Triple-A team's season kicked up this month it meant one more ballgame each week. We love the ballpark though, and were pleasantly surprised to find it ranked in the top 10 for Minor League parks in the country (according to Family Fun Magazine).

Last weekend while the baseball team was on the road, the celebrities took over for an all star softball game and jam to benefit the local little league teams & miracle league. It was such a perfect afternoon for a ballgame and who can pass up live music in center field?

One hit Wonders vs Sultans of Swing

Charlie Robison at bat

I should point out that the managers of the two teams are brothers (and founders of Reckless Kelly) and take the whole game pretty seriously. There were local celebrities, Austin-based bands, former professional athletes and a couple of national names (Kyle Petty). After a Harlem Globetrotter-esque game, we took our blanket to center field for some sun and sound. What a fabulous afternoon!

Oh, and I'm totally counting this as my item #15 .

Six Word Saturday

Four day weeks kick my butt!

I don't so much mind having a Friday off, but having a Monday off really seems to throw the rest of the week into chaos. I always feel like I've been run over by a bus by the time the bell rings at 3:30. I appreciate the idea of Monday off, but that 4 day work sure feels like 6 days when it's finally over.

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The Crap has arrived

I know y'all have been waiting with baited/bated breath for our bag of crap arrival. Sadly, I did not capture video of the the "unwrapping", but I did provide a tweet by tweet for my lucky followers. But never fear, I'll end the misery for you non-tweeters/family. Here's a little something I like to call "Is it $75 worth of crap or an $8 bargain?"

This was the happiest he was the whole time. The box holds so much possibility.

The blind reach approach was the best way to start... and avoid a complete sensory overload. I suggested he wear a blindfold and try to guess the item, but he waited long enough.

First item out of the box was not one, but two band of brothers action figures. Just look at their tiny little rifles and handguns. They were from the Highway to Hell line, and looked like they barely made it back. His face says it all.

Next up was a handheld motocross game. He was a little confused about it, but it was less sucky then the action figures.

Who wouldn't want something pink? That's a lovely xyron personal cutting system carrying case. I was disappointed the cutting system wasn't included. He was disappointed he got a hot pink bag. Especially since the crap was running out.What's this, could it be an actual woot deal? Three dvds of a somewhat recent nature? Yeah, they were used dvds with lots of scratches...but they're still watchable and who doesn't enjoy an all night laugh-fest?

So the question remains, is it an $8 bargain or $75 worth of crap?

Six Word Saturday

Four day weekend, I love you!

After a crazy busy week of fire drills and state mandated testing, Easter Break is a much welcome event. It even gives me enough time to make the 7 hour drive to my parents house in north Louisiana. Now if only I could shake these allergies!

Play along with Cate's Six Word Saturday by clicking the shiny button!

I would rather

Today my job title changed from teacher to test administrator as I ushered in that rite of Spring known as the TAKS. My duties included reading a script on how to bubble in the answer document, handing out said answer documents and sharpening pencils. It was a full 5 hours of "active monitoring", a job that isn't as glamorous as it may sound. Since I couldn't do anything other than walk around staring at kids, I mentally composed a list of things that would be better. In fact there are a number of things I would rather do than actively monitor a test:

I would rather watch a marathon of Rock of Love.

I would rather scratch my eyes out with dull pencils.

I would rather eat liver and onions.

I would rather pull my toenails out with rusty pliers.

I would rather listen to Macarena on repeat loop for 24 hours.

I would rather do the burpee challenge.

I would rather get a bikini wax.

I would rather be a contestant on Fear Factor.

I would rather have the interior of my car sprayed down with Axe body spray on a 100 degree day.

I would rather eat playdough for a week.

I would rather watch David Hasselhoff music videos.

*5 hours in one room with same kids allowed me to become more and more creative.

In the end, I monitored the test, then took the kiddoes out to play kickball. Tomorrow, I go back to teacher status.

When good soap goes bad

I saw these cute easter soaps at Dean & Deluca and just had to find a way to make them for a lot less money ($50 for 16). The Mr even agreed to help me in my endeavor. Somewhere along the line, though, things got a little out of hand. Let's examine shall we?

I found the right size eggs 2 packs for $1 at Michael's. The Mr helped by cutting off one end of the eggs with the drimmel. (and he wore some styling safety glasses while he did it)

I melted down some goat's milk soap base and added color and scent. It poured into the molds without any leaking.

But when I took them out, they were less like eggs, more like phallic symbols. Especially the peach colored ones. I tried to smooth out the mold lines, but then they just looked like giant suppositories. Yikes! No way could these be teacher gifts! And so, a quick trip to Michael's and a 50% off coupon later, and my melted down porno eggs were made much more presentable :)

Six Word Sunday?

I am too sore to move.

or

Epic Challenge left me Epic sore!

So at 8 A.M. yesterday, I tackled the area at our gym affectionately called "the Pit". Yes it is as bad as the images that come to mind. After a group warm-up, we were divided into heats to complete the workout. Being in the last heat did not help me prepare in the least... in fact watching everyone else blaze through only upped my nerves. Without further ado, I give you Epic Challenge:

Deadlifts!

Single arm overhead squats with weight!

Burpee pull-upstire flips!

Rinse and Repeat in Reverse.

Recover!

Six Word Saturday

Today I start the Epic Challenge.

Wish I could say more, but I don't know what it entails other than me being up at this indecent hour on a Saturday so I can eat an hour before doing the workout. I'm a tad bit scared, and still a little sore from last nights workout. But, I am the success story for this month at the gym, so I can't not do it. For more info on the challenge (and a pretty nifty video) visit Crossfit CedarPark.

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Arrested Development

The young un walks to my school every afternoon. He and the SRO cooked up a little April Fool's Day prank for me. He's been begging to do this since the first day of school.